Understanding Love as a Choice: Insights from a Thought-Provoking Tweet

In a world saturated with romantic ideals and whimsical notions of love, a recent tweet by Gbenga Samuel-Wemimo challenges conventional beliefs about love and emotions. The tweet poses a profound question: Have you ever found yourself developing feelings for someone you know you shouldn’t? This simple yet powerful query opens the door to a deeper exploration of the nature of love, choice, and emotional control.

The Dilemma of Forbidden Feelings

Many individuals experience moments where they develop feelings for someone deemed inappropriate, whether due to circumstances, relationships, or personal ethics. This phenomenon is not uncommon and can lead to internal conflict. The initial attraction may feel overwhelming, yet the awareness that pursuing these feelings could lead to complications often creates a sense of guilt or confusion.

Gbenga’s tweet taps into this universal experience, prompting readers to reflect on their own lives. It reminds us that the heart can sometimes lead us astray, causing us to question the authenticity of our feelings. Are we truly in love, or are we simply drawn to the thrill of the forbidden?

The Power of Choice in Love

One of the most striking aspects of Gbenga’s message is the assertion that love is a choice rather than an uncontrollable feeling. This perspective challenges the romanticized notion that love is purely instinctual, uncontrollable, and predestined. Instead, it emphasizes the role of conscious decision-making in our emotional lives.

When we recognize that love can be a choice, we empower ourselves to take control of our feelings. This realization can be liberating. It means that we are not merely passive victims of our emotions but active participants in shaping our romantic experiences. We can choose to nurture relationships that align with our values and to let go of those that don’t serve our well-being.

The Act of Killing Unwanted Feelings

Gbenga’s tweet further elaborates on this concept by highlighting the act of "deliberately killing" feelings that are deemed inappropriate or undesirable. This metaphorical expression underscores the idea that we possess the agency to manage our emotions. It suggests that we can consciously choose to extinguish feelings that do not align with our values or circumstances, reinforcing the notion that love is indeed a choice.

The process of letting go of unwanted feelings can be challenging, requiring introspection and emotional resilience. It may involve addressing the reasons behind these feelings, understanding their origins, and ultimately making a conscious choice to move forward. This journey can be empowering, leading to personal growth and a clearer understanding of what we truly desire in our relationships.

The Importance of Self-Awareness

To navigate the complexities of love and attraction, self-awareness is crucial. Understanding our emotions, triggers, and desires enables us to make informed choices. By cultivating self-awareness, we can recognize when we are developing feelings for someone who may not be suitable for us and take proactive steps to address those emotions.

Self-reflection allows us to distinguish between fleeting infatuation and genuine love. It encourages us to evaluate our values, boundaries, and long-term goals. By being attuned to our inner selves, we can make choices that align with our authentic desires, leading to healthier and more fulfilling relationships.

The Role of Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence plays a significant role in our ability to manage feelings and make choices in love. It encompasses the capacity to recognize, understand, and influence our emotions and the emotions of others. Individuals with high emotional intelligence can navigate complex emotional landscapes more effectively, making choices that reflect their true desires and values.

By developing emotional intelligence, we can enhance our relationships and foster deeper connections with others. This skill enables us to communicate openly about our feelings and intentions, promoting healthier dynamics in our romantic lives.

Conclusion: Love as a Conscious Choice

Gbenga Samuel-Wemimo’s tweet serves as a poignant reminder that love is not merely a whimsical force that sweeps us off our feet but a conscious choice that requires thought and intention. By recognizing our agency in matters of the heart, we can navigate the complexities of attraction and emotion with greater clarity and purpose.

In a society that often romanticizes the idea of love as an uncontrollable passion, it is refreshing to consider the empowering notion that we have the ability to choose who we love and how we engage with those feelings. Embracing this perspective allows us to cultivate healthier relationships, rooted in self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and genuine connection.

Ultimately, love is a journey that invites us to explore not only our feelings but also our choices. By understanding the nature of our emotions and consciously choosing how to respond to them, we can create a more fulfilling and meaningful romantic life. Whether we find ourselves in the throes of attraction or the depths of emotional turmoil, the key takeaway is clear: love is a choice, and we hold the power to make it a conscious and intentional one.

Have you ever been there?

You find yourself developing feelings for someone who you should not be developing feelings for.

Remember how you deliberately killed it and it died.

That is all the proof you need to know love is a choice and not an uncontrollable feeling!

— Gbenga Samuel-Wemimo (@GbengaWemimo) June 1, 2025

Have you ever been there?

We’ve all experienced those moments when our feelings seem to take on a life of their own. You know what I mean—when you find yourself developing feelings for someone you absolutely know you shouldn’t be developing feelings for. It’s like a rollercoaster ride of emotions, and you’re just along for the ride, even though deep down, you want to pull the brakes. It’s confusing, frustrating, and oh-so-human.

You find yourself developing feelings for someone who you should not be developing feelings for.

It’s like the universe has a twisted sense of humor, right? You meet someone, and there’s an instant connection. Maybe it’s their laugh, their intelligence, or just the way they look at you. But then reality sets in, and you remember all the reasons why this is a bad idea. Perhaps they’re your best friend’s ex, or maybe they’re in a complicated relationship. Whatever the scenario, it’s a classic case of “why am I feeling this way?” You start questioning your sanity, wondering how your heart could override your better judgment.

Remember how you deliberately killed it and it died.

We’ve all been there, haven’t we? You try to squash those feelings like an unwanted bug. You tell yourself, “This isn’t worth it.” You might even go so far as to create distance, avoid eye contact, or even cut off communication completely. And just like that, you think you’ve killed it. But isn’t it fascinating how emotions can be so resilient? Sometimes, it feels like they’re just lying in wait, ready to spring back to life when you least expect it. But here’s the kicker: you had the power to “kill it” in the first place. You made a conscious choice to step back, and that speaks volumes about the nature of love and attraction.

That is all the proof you need to know love is a choice and not an uncontrollable feeling!

So, what does this all mean? It suggests that love isn’t just some uncontrollable force that sweeps you off your feet. Instead, it’s more like a series of choices we make every day. You can choose to entertain those feelings or to redirect your focus elsewhere. This perspective can be incredibly empowering. By acknowledging that love is a choice, you gain control over your emotional landscape.

Many of us grow up believing that love is this magical thing that just happens to us. But as we mature, we learn that it often involves decisions—decisions about who we want to let into our lives and how we choose to engage with them. This understanding can lead to healthier relationships and a more fulfilling emotional life.

Why is it so hard to let go of feelings?

Even when you know that developing feelings for someone is a bad idea, letting go can be incredibly tough. Why do you think that is? For starters, feelings are complex and multifaceted. They’re influenced by your experiences, your desires, and even your fears. Sometimes, we cling to feelings not because we want to pursue them, but because they provide a sense of comfort or excitement that we might be missing in other areas of our lives. It’s the allure of the “what if” that keeps the flame burning, even when logic tells us to extinguish it.

Moreover, societal norms often complicate our emotional responses. Movies and books tend to glorify the idea of forbidden love, making it seem like a romantic adventure rather than a potential emotional disaster. This can create unrealistic expectations and pressures, making it even harder to let go when you know you should.

How to manage those unwanted feelings

If you find yourself in this situation, here are some strategies to help you manage those unwanted feelings:

• Acknowledge your feelings: Ignoring your emotions won’t make them disappear. Instead, take a moment to acknowledge what you’re feeling. Journal about it or talk to a trusted friend. Sometimes, just saying it out loud can help you process and release it.
• Set boundaries: If you’re developing feelings for someone who is off-limits, it’s essential to establish boundaries. This could mean limiting your interactions or avoiding situations where you might be tempted to act on those feelings. Protecting your emotional well-being is key.
• Shift your focus: Redirect your energy towards something more fulfilling. Dive into hobbies, invest time in friendships, or focus on self-improvement. The more you fill your life with positive experiences, the less room there is for unwanted feelings to take hold.
• Practice self-compassion: It’s easy to be hard on yourself for developing feelings for someone you shouldn’t. Remember, you’re human, and feelings are part of the experience. Be kind to yourself as you navigate this complex emotional landscape.

Find empowerment in your choices

At the end of the day, recognizing that love is a choice can be liberating. It means you are in control of your emotional journey. You have the power to decide who you want to invest in emotionally, and that’s a significant realization. Every time you choose to walk away from a situation that doesn’t serve you, you’re not only protecting your heart but also empowering yourself to make better choices in the future.

So next time you find yourself in a complicated emotional situation, remember: you’ve been there before. You’ve felt the pull of attraction, and you’ve also had the strength to “kill it” when necessary. Use that knowledge to guide your choices moving forward, and embrace the idea that love, at its core, is a decision.

In essence, love is not merely an uncontrollable feeling; it’s a beautiful blend of choice, intention, and action. So, embrace your power, make those choices wisely, and watch how your emotional landscape transforms. After all, you’re the one holding the reins of your heart!